Humor, Satire

Jackson Family Announces Tribute Concert That Will Never Happen

By Bill Matthews

Just one performance no one will see come October

(BEVERLY HILLS) Michael Jackson’s mom and four of his siblings announced plans for a tribute concert later this year in Wales, and are already looking forward to eventually canceling it. You see, the chaos that surrounded the King of Pop follows him in death too, and the real tribute is how soon this planned concert will devolve into madness.

The pop singer’s mother, Katherine Jackson, and siblings Latoya, Marlon, Jackie and Tito said the soon-to-be endlessly delayed show is scheduled for Oct. 8 at Wales Millennium Centre in Cardiff, Wales, but did not reveal any performers.

Latoya said in her breathless, baby voice that the “tribute will be something that’s spectacular” and is “far, far, well overdue.” Katherine Jackson called it “a show fit for a king. If my son were here today, he would feel the same way.”

To the Jackson family’s credit, shenanigans began shortly after the initial announcement of “Michael Forever—The Tribute Concert.” Brothers Randy and, strangely, Jermaine, said they opposed the show because it will be held during the trial of a doctor charged in their brother’s death. Jermaine’s objection is especially odd because he’s usually the first in front of the camera when it comes to his superstar brother’s memory.

“While we wholeheartedly support the spirit of a tribute that honors our brother, we find it impossible to support an event that is due to take place during the criminal trial surrounding Michael’s death,” Jermaine and Randy wrote in a statement posted on each of their Twitter accounts.

Jury selection in the involuntary manslaughter trial of Dr. Conrad Murray is scheduled to begin on September 8, with opening statements later in the month. The case is expected to last four to six weeks, and Randy and Jermaine believe its duration should be a time of worldwide mourning where no one does anything.

“There will come a time and place for an amazing and deserving tribute to Michael,” the brothers’ statement read. “But we feel that the most important tribute we can give to our brother at this time is to seek justice in his name.”

In that light, Jermaine has begun a search for former Atlanta Braves outfielder David Justice.

The tribute concert will “feature the world’s most amazing music performers,” according to the head of British promoter Global Live, meaning none of the surviving Jacksons, unless Janet shows up. The roster will be revealed online one act at a time over the next two weeks, starting Tuesday, said Chris Hunt, indicating this will allow a greater opportunity for the concert to fail. All profits from the show would go to several U.S. and British charities, including a cancer group created by the prince of Wales, Hunt said.

The show would be at least four hours long, Hunt said, if it was to actually come off. The venue will seat up to 75,000 people, he said, which would have come in handy if Michael was performing.

“I know my brother would be very, very proud to see all the artists that he admired and respected so much coming together,” Tito Jackson said. He added that Michael might also enjoy this planned concert.

Hunt presented the Jackson family with a $100,000 check that will go to a trust fund for Michael Jackson’s three children, Prince, Paris and Blanket, which they can access when they turn 21. The children, Katherine Jackson and several unidentified charities are the sole beneficiaries of Jackson’s estate—valued in the hundreds of million—so they plan to use the $100,000 to play Monopoly.

Sisters Rebbie and Janet are wisely not getting mixed up in this foolishness.

© 2011 The Peoples News

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