African American, Black men, black women, Humor, Relationships, Satire

White Woman Goes Black, But Then Goes Back

By Bill Matthews

j0438592Murphy and and her new boyfriend went to his company’s outing on Friday.

(LOS ANGELES) Staci Murphy never set out to be a trailblazer. But last week, she did something that had never been done before.

Murphy, a white woman who ended a yearlong romance with a black man in April, began a relationship with Mike Schwartz who, incredibly, is not black. Schwartz, in fact, is white.

“I had always heard that once you go black you never go back. But I thought it was just a semi-clever rhyme,” Murphy told The Peoples News. “I didn’t know it was an actual rule that had never been broken.”

Murphy, 32, started dating African-American co-worker Samad Mayers, 36, in March 2008. But after a year, she knew it “just wasn’t going anywhere.” So she broke up with him. She met Schwartz, 27, at a church picnic in June, and they went out for the first time on July 17.

Every single other white person before Murphy who dated blacks went out with them exclusively until they either married or died. But Murphy was somehow able to break that chain.

“It really is an unprecedented behavior,” said Rachelle Brooks, a sociologist and author of Once You Go Black… “Once white people succumb to the allure that black people hold, they have never been able to get away from it. That’s one of the reasons interracial dating was such a taboo.”

Mayers said he really liked Murphy and is embarrassed that their relationship set a precedent.

“I guess from now on, people will say ‘Once you go black, you never go back, unless you were dating Samad,'” admitted the crestfallen man.

In response to the shocking development, however, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration announced that blacker berries do still produce sweeter juice.

Note: This article is satire, brought to you by the creative minds at The Peoples News.

© 2009 The Peoples News

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Discussion

2 thoughts on “White Woman Goes Black, But Then Goes Back

  1. Ask me how many black women prefer a little cream in their coffee.

    Posted by Mike | July 23, 2009, 4:52 pm
  2. Very, very funny! Poor Samad. Thanks for this one.

    Posted by CandyKay | July 26, 2009, 9:36 am

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