Humor, Satire

We Know What He’s Sayin’: Rapper Sets Verbal Record

By Xavier Muhammad

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Rapper Charles “C-Dogg” Turner knows what he’s sayin’

(ATLANTA) Rapper Charles “C-Dogg” Turner broke his own record last night by saying ‘you know’ and ‘know what I’m sayin?’ 232 times in a 25-minute interview. Even he was impressed with his repetitive verbiage.

“I didn’t even, you know, you know, know I was close, know what I’m sayin?’” said Turner after being informed of the new mark. “Last, you know, time I did it, you know, I wasn’t even, you know, trying. I wasn’t, like you know, this time either but it, know what I’m saying, just came out of me.”

The interviewer, Keith Chappelle of Vibe magazine, said five minutes into the session he could sense Turner was onto something special.

“I started egging him on,” Chappelle said. “I started asking him to tell me things that he knew. Then I would look confused, like I didn’t know what he was saying. But after a while, I didn’t even have to do that.”

At one point, Chappelle asked Turner if he understood the Pythagorean Theorem, an equation used in geometry to determine distance between two points. Turner gave this remarkable answer: ‘You know, um, you know, it’s like, know what I’m saying, you know, I think, you know, it’s like with math and, you know, um the equality of, you know, sides and a, you know, squared, plus, like, you know, b and, know what I’m saying, squared, equaling, you know, c, like you know, squared, you know?”

The rapper “was on a roll then,” said Chappelle. “I knew he had it.”

Turner has held the record since a fabled July 2004 interview with The Source. There he used the two phrases 198 times in a 21-minute interview, shattering a 10-year-old record held by rock singer Courtney Love.

“I didn’t think Love’s diatribe would ever be broken,” said Clyde Hammerschmidt, spokesman for the Guiness Book of World Records. “It just shows what you can do if you are completely determined and relatively illiterate.”

Turner, whose next album comes out in June, says he has bigger dreams.

“My vocabulary, you know, ain’t that big, know what I’m sayin’? I think I can, you know, say it a whole bunch more times and, you know, know what I’m sayin’ put it out in, you know, outer space,” Turner said. “Know what I’m sayin’?”

Note: This article is satire, brought to you by the creative minds at The Peoples News. It’s not real, but we hope it made you think.

© 2008 The Peoples News

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Discussion

22 thoughts on “We Know What He’s Sayin’: Rapper Sets Verbal Record

  1. And you think this is something to be proud of or news worthy enough to write a story about. This is absolutely ridiculous and part of Black peoples problems.

    Posted by Terri | March 15, 2008, 4:35 am
  2. These are so silly! I know who will really like this one.
    Dude said “if you’re relatively illiterate.” HA!

    Posted by name | March 15, 2008, 11:28 pm
  3. I think this young man needs to hear himself on a tape recorder. Stop making fun of people and try and help them become better people. This kind of ignorance affects everyone. You make money on his shortcommings, and he gets to walk through not understanding that people like you are laughing at him. It’s not only a disgrace om him, but you should be ashamed of how you are exploiting people for air time.

    Posted by the voice | March 17, 2008, 11:52 am
  4. This guy is so totally illiterate that it is embarassing. He must it amazing to have broken a record on sheer ignorance. Can you imagine what intelligence he will bring forth on his new album? I guess he’ll be breaking his own record on illiteracy.

    Posted by Jahaliya | March 18, 2008, 11:54 am
  5. Excuse my illiteracy. I meant to say “He must find it amazing to have broken a record on sheer ignorance”. Pardon me.

    Posted by Jahaliya | March 18, 2008, 11:55 am
  6. Extremely funny, but sadly extremely true.

    Posted by Bob | March 18, 2008, 7:21 pm
  7. And none of you must read becuase it clearly says: Note: This article is satire, brought to you by the creative minds at The Peoples News. It’s not real, but we hope it made you think.

    Posted by Mo | March 19, 2008, 10:24 am
  8. It’s shameful that many of folks leaving comments have no clue that these articles are pure satire! Look the word up folks!

    Posted by Shay-Shay | March 20, 2008, 11:21 am
  9. When will your responder’s understand, as Bob and Mo do, that these articles are here to open up constructive dialogue on what other races see when they see “us”? I find it HILARIOUS and SAD that folks like “the voice” believe that C Dogg is an actual performer making money. On another note, this article put me in mind of the earlier days of L.L. Cool J. ; know what I’m sayin?

    Posted by TJ | March 20, 2008, 11:43 am
  10. It’s not “know what I’m saying.” It’s “knumsayin.” Just watch the next special about incarcerated young black men and listen to their prounciation of the term (even the white and latino inmates talk like that). This is really some hilarious satire, made even more so by the comments of those benighted souls who think it is real!

    Posted by NOAH HOLCOMB | March 22, 2008, 2:14 am
  11. I love it. Keep ’em coming. Ya’ know what I’m saying.

    Posted by Leila | March 22, 2008, 5:59 am
  12. I think some of these responders are part of the satire. Has to be.

    Posted by Phil | March 24, 2008, 2:36 pm
  13. Satire folks, satire. The use of humor to illustrate a point. The point here that the grammar and syntax of Americans these days, regardless of genetics, is atrocious.

    The world “like” should be used, like, as a comparitive, “A .380 is like a 9mm”, or to indicate appreciation “I like that comparison.” But it is not used as, say, a comma. Even then commas are used to seperate seperate parts or clauses in a whole sentence, whereas the word “like” does seem to show up in some people’s speech as often as vowels.

    I don’t care what color you are or what accidents of birth you enjoy, when you’re listening to someone who inserts “like” into sentences as often as, you know, there are grains of sand on a beach, it can be a real struggle to take whatever it is they have to actually say seriously.

    Word.

    Posted by Quincy Ryan | March 25, 2008, 3:11 pm
  14. Not to criticize….but you guys are working too slow!!! Keep it coming , knawmean? The more you put out the more I can bust a gut, laughing at your sarcastic wit and even moreso at my people jumping on a bandwagon because they didn’t read the fine print that says “satire”!!! They’re as funny as you are!! Too bad if you dont bother reading all of it you’re probably NOT gonna think too much….Love it!!!

    Posted by run8gene | March 25, 2008, 3:45 pm
  15. So you think making fun of african americans is ok? Well listen, cracker head, your day is coming! It just shows how ignorant your race is. Cant find anything else amusing to talk about? What about all of the serial killings, the high school killings, the petafiles, rapists………

    The Peoples News responds: Cracker head? Umm…we’re all black, cscates1451. What, by the way, is a ‘petafile’? Someone who molests PETA activists?

    Posted by Whatever | March 26, 2008, 6:58 pm
  16. Why haven’t I ever heard of this rapper? I live in Atlanta and I have never heard of him. I just want to say that using, “you know” and “know what I’m saying” is a form of expression. It’s a way to make sure that the people you’re talking to can really feel you. You know what I’m saying?

    Posted by Kujichagulia | March 27, 2008, 8:50 am
  17. oh i love this article… I am sending it to my nephew stationed in Germany since his 3 most used phrases is “check this out,” “you know,” and “you know what I’m saying.”

    Posted by Lz4broc | March 27, 2008, 6:45 pm
  18. He should run for Miss America.

    Posted by coach | March 29, 2008, 11:54 pm
  19. i love your site. it’s so funnee, but it’s so true. i find the only people who find it offensive are the ones who probably need this wake up call. keep on doing what you’re doing. you have a lot of people thinking your articles are true you must be on the right track, keep on keeping on.

    Posted by bonita | March 31, 2008, 11:30 pm
  20. Word! Here in the D we say ya know all the time cause it’s what it is, ya know. I mean you hear the mayor say it , the govenor say it, every body does, ya know, know what Im sayin!

    Posted by KnowAll | April 5, 2008, 10:37 pm
  21. Hey… this is some funny stuff keep it up. I’m cracking up evertime I read on of them. They are like Those political satire cartoons with out the pictures …just words. They are funny and sometimes kinda crazy but funny as hell and still puts something on your mind to make you think. Their great! Keep’em coming!

    Posted by Ken L. D | April 28, 2008, 10:52 am
  22. I fell out of my damn chair reading this aloud to my husband!!!

    Posted by Ann | May 12, 2008, 9:22 pm

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